Navigating Healing During the Holiday Season

As the holiday season approaches, many of us look forward to joyous celebrations and quality time spent with loved ones. This festive time of year is often hailed as a time of love and togetherness but for those who are dealing with grief, loss, mental health challenges, family dynamics, strained relationships and other forms of healing, the holiday’s focus on togetherness can be a painful reminder of what is missing or broken.

Welcome back to my blog. Navigating healing during the holidays is a common experience for many people. If you find yourself on this journey, you are NOT alone!

For many years I cringed at the inevitable conversations during the holiday season that all seem to start with, “How is your…?” To which I reply, “I’m not really sure, I haven’t seen them or talked to them in so long.” Or, “They passed a couple of years ago.” Or, “They are battling poor health so they are not up for the holidays anymore.” (All depends who they were asking about, yes, I navigate all of that.) Then comes the, “Why?” and “How are you doing?” Before you know it you are showered with the curious questions and eventually left feeling drained and like the only person navigating the complexities of life as you sense the judgement and opinions consume the walls of the room. Coping and navigating criticism, memories and new norms in our walk of healing can be emotionally taxing and add an extra layer of stress. While there is no, ‘one size fits all’, on getting through this, I do want to share some words of wisdom that can serve to catapult you to a place of peace and comfort. The world has a way of making us feel alone, inundate our heads with negative voices, and of infiltrating our heart with sadness - but there is a way to renew our mind (Romans 12:2) and overwhelm our heart with peace - that I encourage you to meditate on as you navigate this holiday.

First and foremost, I want to remind you of a few things you need to remember as you heal: (1) You are not alone (Isaiah 41:10); (2) You were created in His image (Genesis 1:27); (3) In Him we have redemption through His blood (Ephesians 1:7-8); (4) God heals the broken hearted (Psalm 147:3); and (5) His promises are unfailing (Psalm 89:2). Scripture is full of stories of dysfunctional families, relationships and broken hearts and in each one, we see God’s unfailing love and favor draw close. God draws close to those that draw near to him (James 4:8) even when we cannot see it amidst our pain. Let’s have a look at how God works while we wait patiently on Him.

In the story of Joseph and his brothers (found in the Book of Genesis - chapters 37 - 50) we learn about Joseph, one of the twelve sons of Jacob and the favorite son of his father. This favoritism causes jealousy among his brothers. This resentment intensifies and eventually, his brothers seize him and throw him into a pit and sell him to a group of traders who take him to Egypt. Joseph endures hardship for many years - he endures slavery at a young age and later he is falsely accused and is imprisoned. But God is with him (turns all things to good (Romans 8:28)) - when Joseph suddenly becomes a trusted advisor to the Pharaoh. During a severe famine his family was forced to go to Egypt for grain where they come to need Joseph’s help, Joseph does not seek revenge, rather, he forgives his brothers. The story emphasizes themes of family dynamics and forgiveness, and divine providence, underscoring the idea that even in challenging circumstances, God's plan can work through the lives of individuals for a greater purpose.

We also witness God’s promise to pour His love over the brokenhearted. The story of Job in the Old Testament is one of many. Job had a deep reverence for God. However, he faced severe trials when Satan challenged the sincerity of his faith. Job experienced the loss of his wealth, his children, and his health. In the midst of his suffering, Job's friends suggested that he must have sinned to deserve such calamities. Job wrestled with his situation. In his anguish, he expressed his pain and despair, questioning God's actions. Job's heart was broken, he sought answers and comfort – he says to the Lord: 'I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’ Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.' God responded to Job, His words served to remind Job of the vastness of His understanding and the limitations of human knowledge. God restores Job's fortunes and blessed him with even greater prosperity than before. The story of Job illustrates that even in the face of profound suffering and a broken heart, God can provide comfort and restoration. In this story we come to learn that we must hold steadfast in God's sovereignty and wisdom, even when faced with the mysteries of pain and suffering.

While there is a plethora of stories that demonstrate God’s unfailing love during trials and tribulations, I want to leave you with one more in the bible where we see God come to reassure that He will bring blessing out of ashes of grief. There was a woman named Naomi. She was known for her unwavering faith and kind heart. She and her husband were chased out of their homeland by famine and went to Moab in search of a better life. However, tragedy struck, her husband passed away, leaving Naomi to grieve in an unfamiliar land. To compound her grief, both of her sons also died and she found herself questioning everything, including God. The beauty revealed through the duration of Naomi’s story is that God often acts as, El Roi (the God Who Sees), behind the scenes of our life stories. Naomi struggled to feel God’s protection. We find Naomi wrestling with her grief and blaming God, when she suddenly felt a divine presence. The room glowed with a gentle light, and a soothing voice, as soft as a whispering breeze, spoke to her: "Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Though the path you walk is shadowed by sorrow, I am your refuge and strength." Through her story, God reveals that He is faithful to His Word. He brings Naomi back to Bethlehem as an expression of His care for her and her family. After returning to Bethlehem Naomi’s daughter-in-law, Ruth, meets Boaz. Boaz is a wealthy man of integrity. While harvesting grain, Boaz tells Ruth, “The Lord Yahweh repay your work, and a full reward be given you by the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.” The word “wings” is a common figure of speech describing God’s protective presence.  Boaz comes to marry Ruth and becomes the Kinsman-Redeemer for their family. In the end, Naomi’s land is returned to her along with her financial means. This is one of most beautiful scenes of redemption throughout Scripture. The key in this scripture are the words, “Who has not left you.” (Ruth 4:14). God’s eyes never left Naomi. As they never leave those who seek Him.

As we navigate trying seasons and healing in our own lives, we must remember that we serve an unfailing God. God will do for you as he did for Joseph, Naomi and Job. John 15:5 reads, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

Here are some things you can do as you wait on Him:

Pray to God – We all need God’s grace to intervene when we are at war with ourselves or others. His word tells us, “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” 1 John 5:14. When we are close enough to God to know his will, we will be able to know when we ask for things whether they line up with God’s purposes for our lives and his kingdom. God wants peace for us always – seek Him and pray in your healing journey and you too will come to know a peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

Forgive – When we allow wounds to fester we cannot be restored. We cannot unleash what we hold onto. “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37.

Trust in God – God promises He will never leave or forsake us on our journey. Matthew 28:20 reads, “…And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Stop to listen - for the sake of understanding – “It is the fool who “takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion” (Proverbs 18:2), and thus “gives an answer before he hears” (Proverbs 18:13).

Seek peace within your walls – “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27), says the Lord. God's desire for peace may stem from a compassionate wish to spare His creation from unnecessary suffering and turmoil.

Set healthy boundaries - Proverbs 4:23 instructs, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Sometimes, creating distance or establishing clear boundaries is necessary for both your well-being and the well-being of your family. Seek God's guidance in discerning the appropriate boundaries to maintain peace and respect within the family unit.

My prayers are with all navigating a season of healing and new norms. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace within your walls in this Holiday season as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Together we can navigate your journey with healing. I have been there. We are better together. Click HERE - FOR A FREE INTRODUCTORY CALL for a free introductory call. Click HERE FOR MY WEBSITE.

Blessings from your life coach and friend, 

Isabel Plasencia 

Certified Life Coach